REAL LIFE X-FILES

Bigfoot Press Conference Fails To Deliver Bigfoot

Despite personal assurances when reached by phone last night, Bigfoot hunter Tom Biscali failed to produce any verifiable or solid evidence authenticating the so called Georgian Bigfoot. The general online consensus is that the whole thing is devolving into a steaming pile of bullshit. According to the AP, Matt Whitton and Rick Dyer, the rednecks who found the alleged corpse, have now changed their story three times and counting. Although they had the attention of the world press, no body was produced, the handpicked scientists chosen to perform the upcoming autopsy weren't present, the so called DNA evidence proved inconclusive, and the skeptics have just became a lot more skeptical. And don't expect any help from the U.S. Fish and Wildlife Reserve either, it's not a priority for them, especially since nonexistent creatures aren't protected. "It's not an endangered species on any list that we've got," explained spokesman Tom Mackenzie. Yet, despite the increasing doubts, the trio still confidently promised that more information is forthcoming and they did—at the very least—hand out two new photos: one close up of the mouth (image right) and another of a living specimen (or a tree) in the woods after the jump.

(Click image to enlarge)

Bigfoot, Bigfoot Press Conference, Matt Whitton, Real Life X-Files, Rick Dyer, Tom Biscali

4 comments

by ANIMAL on August 15, 2008