So, I’ve never been to the Bronx Zoo. Whoops. Luckily for me, these two little kids went and had their dad filmed it, so now I don’t have to! Here’s what this video taught me about the Bronx zoo: all animals move in slow motion except polar bears, everything is green, there’s some sort of magic schoolbus that travels throughout the whole place, all children are silent, and it’s an extremely calm, serene kind of place. Damn. Maybe I should go to the Bronx Zoo.